fruits

I rarely blog twice, but was so humbled by this email I received today that I had to post.

Hey, I don't know if you remember me, but I went to Old Cutler Presbyterian back when I was in high school (like 5 years ago), and attended the youth group when you and Jeremy were working with it.

Anyways, I wasn't a Christian back then (far from it actually), but am now. It's interesting, but the one thing I really remember back from those days was you leading a girls Bible study and sharing a little bit about your testimony. I remember in your tearful talk you telling us girls to wait until marriage to have sex. It's funny, but I believe that one talk kept me from losing my virginity in college before I became a Christian.

So, I wanted to say thank you. You may not remember me, or may not have known it, but you touched my life and I am thankful for that. Now I am an adult leader for the high school youth group at my church, and am hoping to make a difference in their lives, as you have made a difference in mine.

It's amazing how God can use us in ways we would never imagined.

the great discrepancy

This is what He has given us to do, this task here on this earth, not the task we aspired to do, but this one. The absurdities involved cut us down to size. The great discrepancy between what we envisioned and what we've got force us to be real. And God is our great Reality, more real than the realest of earthly conditions, an unchanging Reality. It is His providence that has put us where we are. It's where we belong. It is for us to receive it--all of it--humbly, quietly, thankfully.
-elisabeth elliott

Oh the absurdities! The many mundane things that fill our time. I find myself reminising on the grandour I envisioned for my life and the reality of the pile of clutter that actually is my life. For instance, the four loads of folded laundry stacked in my bedroom waiting to be put away, the overdue movies that Hollywood Video is pestering us about, the mess in the basement, the dog food under the steps, the pile of papers on my desk at work, etc. And I think to myself, is this what it's all about?

Yes, and no. Two things I am sure of: I will never be free of tasks which I don't like, and I have the freedom to choose how I respond to these tasks.

This isn't a "pray for your babies while you monotonously fold each piece of their clothing" philosophy, it's a "choosing to allow God to reshape you as you faithfully fullfill the duties of whatever post you have been called to". I don't want to work full time and also try to juggle being a good mother, wife, friend, housekeeper, etc. But for now, God has allowed me to be in a challenging place, and if I can recieve this -- humbly, quietly, thankfully -- I'm excited to see how he will grow me through this process.

Well, most of the time I'm excited. Alright, some of the time. Ok, let's just say I'm working on it.

For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
-Philippians 2:13

93 minutes wasted

I don't know if "wasted" begins to even do justice to what I happened to my precious time. "Swallowed into the eternal abyss", "painfully stripped", "destroyed with the devastation of a santana blaze" or "massacred" may better describe the moments lost while watching the movie "Deck the Halls".

I rarely say this but I do believe I am actually dummer since watching that movie. See? I just mispelled dumber - I rest my case.

I feel bad only because in general I like the actors in the movie, but seriously, what were they thinking? I will make this brief, but just to recap the torchure which is "Deck the Halls";

- plot: 0
- character development: 0
- ditsy blondes: 3 (so sad, not even funny any more)
- scenes ripped from National Lampoons Christmas; 4+
- cheesy lines: SO MANY!!

Kelly Finch: What is your favorite Christmas memory?
Steve Finch: You know what it is.
Kelly Finch: Tell me.
Steve Finch: I was 7, my dad and I moved to Alabama...and Christmas morning we ate on the floor, ate French fries and drank chocolate milk.
Kelly Finch: That's what Christmas memories are made from, they're not planned, they're not scheduled, nobody puts them in their Blackberry, they just happen.

- laugh factor: 1 for stupidity

I would recap the story line but I will waste even more time trying to figure out what it was. So in summary, compliments of rottentomatoes.com:

"Watching "Deck the Halls" is like getting a lump of coal in your stocking. Except receiving a lump of coal takes only seconds, while this awful movie goes on for an hour and a half."

Do yourself a favor this Christmas. Skip the new holiday movies. Watch the classics; It's a Wonderful Life, Miracle on 34th Street, A Christmas Story, the real National Lampoons Christmas, or even Elf. Better yet, skip movies all together and read a story together, back some cookies for a neighbor, or do some old fashion Christmas caroling.

After all, if you go the movie route, you risk losing your precious time and more importantly - your sanity.

on family

On the eve of Thanksgiving it seems high time to weigh in on what I am thankful for (as cliche as it all seems). And in spite of all the wacky ways in which my little family keeps changing, I am most thankful for that very thing - my little ever changing family.

A year and a half ago my family consisted of Jeremy, myself and our two dogs. Then we added a little boy. Then a little boy left. Then we added another little boy. Then a little girl (a whole blog in itself). Then the little girl left. Then another little boy came. Then the little boy left. Then two little boys came. Did I lose you yet? We are up to 3 little boys, two adults, two dogs.

Then a little boy left - and here we are in our most recent family photo (minus the dogs).



Ah, the adventures of adopting through foster care. Despite our every changing family photo I wouldn't trade what we do for anything. I love these children that come into our family if only for a season. I love how it grows us and shapes us and allows us to be a part of something huge. I love how it brings out the best in both Jeremy and I and forces us to fully rely on God. All of this I am thankful for, despite the heartache that may accompany it.

"Though the sorrow may last through the night, Joy comes in the morning!"
-from the song Trading My Sorrows

the wait

I saw an ad for a book recently entitled "What do you do with your wait?" by Mike Harder. In summary the book seems to discuss what we do when we are waiting on God for something - an answer to prayer, direction, calling, purpose etc.

I touched base with my girlfriend from Miami the other day who recently recieved an answer to prayer after years of waiting. Neither her nor her husband are US citizens. They live in Miami and have religious visas through the church they work for. She is German and he is Haitian, and while she is free to go home to visit her family in Germany, he has been unable to leave the country while waiting approval for permanent residency.

Imagine, they have been married seven years and he has been unable to visit her hometown, her grandparents, any extended friends or family. He has had to remain in the States while she took the children to visit her family. In the grand scheme seven years may not seem that long...but when you are waiting, just waiting, it seems to last a lifetime.

So now the wait is almost over. They received news that the papers have gone through and he will be able to travel about freely. It has inspired me to see them walk through this wait, adjust plans accordingly, with patience and trust in God's ultimate providence and plan.


I think about what I do with my "wait". How I respond in between the here and there. After all, is it really about getting to the place we want to be, or about the journey to get there? If it's about the place, then it seems when we get to Heaven God would just say "yep, here you are - way to go sport". Not so exciting.

I find myself getting so sidetracked on what it is I am looking for or waiting for, that I sometimes lose the lessons God is teaching me in the process.

I'm thankful for friends who inspire me to use the most of my "wait" and encourage me to take advantage of these times of uncertainty to seek God fervently, letting Him gently guide me and grow me. I am also thankful for friends who walk with me through the wait, providing laughter and relief in what would otherwise be stressful times ;-).

worst job

Yeah, I didn't have the best day at work today. And just in case you were thinking that you have it bad...



Cheer up! You could be that guy :-)

truth about beauty

Our pastor is doing a series on the Christ's return, and to highlight this weekends message about the Anti-Christ the theme was "truth and lies". It made me think of this Dove video that I've wanted to post for a while.

The video exposes some lies that the world teaches about beauty, and while I don't know much about Dove, I think the message is relevant.

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised."
Proverbs 31:30

fall behind

As we drove through the winding back roads this morning, I realized the brightly colored leaves that once adorned the skyline where now scattered among the ground. Trees recently thick with rich reds, oranges, and yellows now stood bare and skeletal, preparing for the change of season and cold winter ahead.

I thought out loud and remarked to Jeremy, "I wish it would stay Fall, I'm dreading winter." This sentiment was further solidified as we drove past our favorite pumpkin patch and saw that the corn maze and pumpkins were now cleared out and empty, awaiting the many evergreens that would take their place.

While there are so many things I look forward to in the holiday season, it is always hard to leave memories behind and forge ahead, especially when the path seems dark and uncertain.

My mother sent me an encouraging verse when I spent my first month away from home working at a summer camp when I was sixteen. It reminded me then, as it does now, that no matter what season we are in God calls us to find joy in all circumstances:

"Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior."

Habakkuk 3:17-18

Here's a favorite fall memory!


Jeremy in the corn maze with Michael in tow.

call of God

Another inspiring message from Elisabeth Elliot. It's amazing how much God teaches us through others.

Discerning the Call of God

As a little girl I especially loved the story of God's call to the child Samuel as he lay sleeping in the temple. I wondered if God would ever call me. Would I hear Him? What would He say? Throughout my growing years I read missionary stories and heard them told at our dinner table by guests from many lands who came to stay with us. I was always eager to know just how they were called. As a college student I worried much about whether I would fail to follow the Shepherd, would be deaf to His call. I thought it such a bewildering matter.

It is not a worry anymore. Experience has taught me that the Shepherd is far more willing to show His sheep the path than the sheep are to follow. He is endlessly merciful, patient, tender, and loving. If we, His stupid and wayward sheep, really want to be led, we will without fail be led. Of that I am sure.

When we need help, we wish we knew somebody who is wise enough to tell us what to do, reachable when we need him, and even able to help us. God is. Omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent--everything we need. The issue is confidence in the Shepherd Himself, a confidence so complete that we offer ourselves without any reservation whatsoever and determine to do what He says.

What He says? But how shall I know that?

He calls us every day, "o'er the tumult of our life's wild, restless sea." He comes to us in the little things, in the ordinary duties which our place in life entails. When I was a child He called me. The duty which my place in life entailed was obedience to my father and mother. In school and Sunday School He called me through the teacher. What she said I knew I was supposed to do. In first grade (yes, in public school) we sang the hymn, "Father, We Thank Thee." The second stanza says, "Help us to do the things we should, to be to others kind and good, in all we do at work or play to grow more loving every day." God's call again.

It's alluring to think of our own situation as very complex and ourselves as deep and complicated, so that we waste a good deal of time puzzling over "the will of God." Frequently our conscience has the answer.

My friend Jim O'Donnell tells how he, a hard-headed, hard-hearted man of the world, found Christ. His conscience was awakened. The call of God was immediate: "Go home and love your wife." The change was so sudden and so radical, Lizzie could not make head or tail of what had come over him. This self-confident and self-interested man had quit living for himself. He had died. An altogether new kind of life was now his. The first difference it made was the difference that mattered most--in his private life. It was there that he began to obey.

We are not talking here about audible voices. Although people in Bible times often heard God speak, we can expect that He will usually speak today through conscience, through the written Word, through other people, and through events. Events themselves, the seemingly insignificant happenings of every day, reveal the will of God. They are the will of God for us, for while we live, move, and have our being here on earth, in this place, this family, this house, this job, we live, move, and have our being in God. He "pulls strings through circumstances," as Jim Elliot said, even the bad circumstances (see Genesis 45:8, 50:20).

Three questions may help to clarify the call of God. Have I made up my mind to do what He says, no matter what the cost? Am I faithfully reading His Word and praying? Am I obedient in what I know today of His will?

"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul" (Psalm 143:8, NIV).

little interruptions

 "She delighted in seeing her plan upset by unexpected events, saying that it gave her great comfort, and that she looked on such things as an assurance that God was watching over her stewardship, was securing the accomplishment of His will, and working out His own designs. Whether she traced the secondary causes to the prayer of a child, to the imperfection of an individual, to obstacles arising from misunderstandings, or to interference of outside agencies, she was joyfully and graciously ready to recognize the indication of God's ruling hand, and to allow herself to be guided by it."  - The Life and Letters of Janet Erskine Stuart

 

I remember watching Dom struggle once to fit a little block into the square whole it was made for.  After several minutes of trying to manuever the object unsuccessfully, I held his hand and showed him how to adjust the block to fit through the hole.  He was initially frustrated at my interference, but when he watched the object fall into the belly of the toy, he was excited to see his progress. 

 

I wonder how often God has tried to intervene in my life, and I have pushed Him away, for fear that he is ruining my plans.  How many people have I brushed off because I was in a hurry to be somewhere?  What messages have I missed because I was running around?  How many projects or plans have I messed up because I tried to go it alone instead of allowing God to guide me through it?  And when intereferences do occur, how many times have I complained about it instead of believing that God works in and through ALL circumstances - even the inconvenient ones?

 

What if we delighted in seeing our plans interupted by unexpected events?  What if we could really view all of these inconviences as a divine opportunities to see God's gentle hand in our life, slowly guiding us through our journey and training us in the way we should go?  

 

How wonderful to live life this way.