breaking the husk

Ouch. This hit home.

The worst pains we experience are not those of the suffering itself but of our stubborn resistance to it, our resolute insistence on our independence. To be "crucified with Christ" means what Oswald Chambers calls "breaking the husk" of that independence. "Has that break come?" he asks. "All the rest is pious fraud." And you and I know, in our heart of hearts, that that sword-thrust (so typical of Chambers!) is the straight truth.

If we reject this cross, we will not find it in this world again. Here is the opportunity offered. Be patient. Wait on the Lord for whatever He appoints, wait quietly, wait trustingly. He holds every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every month of every year in His hands. Thank Him in advance for what the future holds, for He is already there. "Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup" (Psalm 16:5, NIV). Shall we not gladly say, "I'll take it, Lord! YES! I'll trust you for everything. Bless the Lord, O my soul!

Read the entire entry here: http://www.elisabethelliot.org/devotional.html

C

report

If God were a psychologist and had to submit reports to himself, this might be his latest. I've submitted it for your enjoyment in APA format.    

 

Introduction 

It appears to be common among the human race, to desire to have control and power over lifes circumstances.  This includes issues related to finance, work, family, and health.  Of course, mankind should not try to control their future but submit to God's will and place their trust in Him. It is hypothesised, that if man were to lose the ability to control his own life and direction, his trust and faith in God for provision would increase.   

 

Method

 

Participants

A female, married mother of three in her late twenties, was intentionally preselected for this study due to an extremely high tendency to assert her own power and control over situations rather than relying on God and having faith in Him alone.  

 

Materials  

The females dependence on herself to find answers and attempt to regain control was weighed against her dependance and faith in God over her future.  These two variables were measured by God.   

 

Procedure

Through various circumstances the females assurance of financial stability, family health or the future of the children became unstable.  Though control was never really hers to begin with, the allusion of control over these matters was taken away so that subject would feel powerless.      

 

Results

With no resources of her own to turn to, it was determinded that the female began to place more reliance and faith in God to provide for her future, than in her own efforts.  She gained a renewed thirst for God's Word and began to concentrate more on trying to place her trust in Him than to try to continue to control her circumstances.  

 

Discussion

The results of this study were consistent with the hypothesised outcome.  As the female had less control, she relied on God more.  Further research in this area may include blessing the woman with everything she has ever desired to see if she continues to place her faith and trust in God.  

p.s. Add a scipture tag to your blog http://www.christianwomenonline.net/scripturetags.html

C

soaked

Last night was bath night for the babies.  I wish I could say I was supermom and bathed all three everynight, but in our house baths are on an "as needed" basis.  Usually I bath the twins in their baby bath and then Dom in the big tub, but last night I decided to try to put one of the twins, Michael (5 mon), in the bath with Dom (1 1/2) to save time. 

 

I thought it was a great idea, and was affirmed by Michaels cackling giggles as I placed him in the tub with Dom.  The next moment Dom got excited too, and began splashing ferociuosly while making a high pitched yell/scream/laugh noise.  Michael immediately freaked and his little face and body tensed as water splashed all over him.  He didn't have a chance to cry through all the water on his face but managed to look up at me ponderously as if to say "mommy, what where you thinking?"  Now commited to the task, I tried to hold Michael up (who can't sit up on his own) with one slippery hand while washing him with the other.  At that point Dom decided to catapault out of the tub onto my lap and managed to soak me from the waist down.  I soon became frustrated that neither baby would comply with my perfect plan.  I don't remember the rest, but 15 minutes later all babies were clean and ready for bed.  

 

I'm not sure what the bigger lesson is for me: to have more patience in completing a task, to not force someone into a situation they are not ready for, or to not wear my work clothes when bathing babies?

 

I was disappointed with myself for trying to rush through bath time and for being angry with Dom for getting water all over the place.  I did however manage to slow down after bath time.  I rocked the babies and sang songs to them.  I read books with Domieian for a long time.  I'm trying to remember to have more patience, not rush things, and enjoy the blessings of today.  Afterall, we're not gauranteed that we will still have that same blessing tommorrow. 

C

running

Two things I learned today:

1. $25 of gas will keep your car iddling for 15 hours plus.

2. If your car is left running in your driveway in Schenectady overnight, it will not necessarily be stolen.

Yes. I left my car running in my driveway overnight. Jeremy discovered my blunder this morning when he went to go to the grocery store and the car was already on and ready to go. I somehow managed to get out of it last night after returning from work, and failed to take out the keys and turn it off. So far Jeremy has only used this against me twice today:

ME: Honey, you forgot to hang up your towel.

HIM: I'm sorry, WHO left the car on overnight?

I guess I should get used to it. I will be hearing about this one for some time. Thank the Lord (seriously) that our brand new Kia Sedona did not get stolen - I don't think insurance covers stolen vehicles that had the keys in the ignition.

On a brighter note, I don't have to work all weekend and am excited for some much needed family time. Thankfully we still have the van to get us all around.

C

identity box

Years after starting this blog (I think I reserved it back when we lived in Miami) I am actually making an effort to blog regularly. This has inspired me to look up my old blogs from Myspace(sigh)Iand re-post them here periodically. This ones from August 20th, 2005.

I enjoy Myspace. I find it to be a great way to connect to old friends and new friends, keep in touch, vent out some thoughts, and carve out my own little corner of the giant internet cyberspace. Lately however I have run into one major problem that I like to call: the myspace identity box.

In mapping out this tiny little page I have struggled to incorporate all of who I am into one miniscule page that is supposed to define me for all of the internet world to see. No matter how much more I add to my site however I feel that every word or picture backs me further into a corner. My vast wonderous God inspired identity has been packed and shaped into a tiny little box. The image that comes to mind is from the movie Aladdin where the Genie talks about his powers of the universe being confined to an "itty bitty living space" inside the lamp.

I am tempted to erase my entire page just so that my identity will not be confined to a box, but seriously, that would just be boring. So I'll leave it up, but just for the record, I will try to sum up in an honest and candid manner, at my very core, who I am.

I am child of God saved by grace. This means two things to me. First, that I've found that on my own I am hopeless to find any real meaning in life, proven after a long search in my teen years that left me mostly bruised and scarred. Second, that my only redemption and identity is found in God through his son Jesus. Seriously, who is perfect? I'm an idiot most of the time and even on my best days I am a messy reflection of who I wish I was. Everything I try to do on my own I screw up beyond comprehension, so I've given up trying on my own and have embraced my Creator as my life mentor.

So that's me. A messy reflection of Christ. Try to put that in a box.

Good to remind myself where my priorities are.

C

light in the valley

"He must be a satisfaction so deep that when death takes away everything that you love - but gives you more of Christ- you count it gain."  John Piper

 

I'm working on that "satisfaction so deep" part. 

 

I'll keep you updated.  C

 

 

Oh man

Jeremy updated my blog.  Hope it's working!